Cathy Nagy, M.A., C. Psych. AssociateSchedule
Relationships can be wonderful, intimate, caring and supportive... but they are not perfect. You might find that you can relate to some or all of the following common couples' issues in the questions below:
- Are you having the same arguments over and over and getting nowhere?
- Do you find that you and your partner are drifting apart, unsure of how to reconnect?
- Do you or your partner have built up resentments and feelings of anger that are interfering with your connection?
- Do you find that you are so busy with kids, work, or other responsibilities that you have lost the "spark" that you used to have in your relationship?
- Are you worried that your relationship is impacting your children in a way that concerns you?
- Has there been a breach of trust in the relationship that you are having difficulty recovering from?
If you find that aspects of your own relationship were described in any of the above, or if you are experiencing any other issues that are affecting your happiness as a couple, you may want to consider how you can begin to work toward having the relationship that you want.
How counselling can help
Picture two actors, on a stage, rehearsing their scene, each with a script in their hand... One actor reads their line, the other reads theirs, and on and on it goes. Over time, couples' interactions can become somewhat scripted, just like two actors on a stage.
In your relationship, it is likely that you can almost predict what your partner will say or do before they have said it or done it, just like they can likely predict your responses. This is because you have practiced this same "script" over and over throughout your relationship. Although you may not be aware of it, if there is something going wrong in that script then you are likely to find yourself stuck in a negative interaction pattern.
Through listening and understanding your individual needs and desires, we can help you to identify your "relationship script", and where you are stuck so that you can work toward finding alternate ways of communicating what you are really trying to say to each other.
Many couples are hesitant to try therapy, for various reasons. Be assured that the goal of couples counselling is NOT to find fault, point fingers, or place blame. The goal is to create a neutral environment where both of you feel safe enough to explore what is happening in the relationship such that you can reach a deeper understanding that will allow you to meet each other's needs as well as your own.
Through therapy it is possible to:
- improve communication skills
- rebuild connection
- feel heard and understood
- end hurtful patterns
- heal and grow
- let go of resentments
- enjoy a satisfying sex life
- achieve your goals as a couple
"Out of clutter, find simplicity. From discord, harmony.
In the middle of difficulty, lies opportunity." - Albert Einstein